Please read my poem "Embrace"?

The warmth felt inside

The feelings I can’t hide

My eyes show it as it is

And show me what I miss

So I hold you here while I can

With no plan

Just embrace

And just in case

I kiss you like it’s my last

But I don’t take it fast

You’re my procrastination

My fascination

So I take a breath like a test

Calm and quietly while you’re on my chest

Head beneath the nook of neck

The moment so perfect

My heartbeat met by yours

The sound so pure

That there’s nothing to say

As it lulls us away

✅ Answers

🥇 Favorite Answer

  • It has too much rhyming.It is too cliched.It doesn’t say any thing special that hasn’t already been said before in a billion ways.

    Perhaps if you rewrote it and reworded it and change the forced rhyming you could make a better poem of it.

    Try.

  • to rhyme all the time with a quick breezy tick is easy as it is lazy and feels crazy, like an appeal to dismiss what it would address.

    How was this?

  • Beautiful!!!

  • its lovely 🙂

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