I am 15 years old and my mum has been dead 4 years this year. My dad started dating this woman about 2 years ago. Her name is Catherine and she has 7 kids, Adam 10, Joseph 9 Mia and Ava 7, Christopher 5 and Angel and Angela 3. When they started dating they did not try to blend us which I was happy about that because I was still really struggling with my mums death and was on antidepressants because I saw my mum die when she was hit by a car.
When dad and Catherine got engaged they started bringing her kids around to the house and dad would tell me that I have to come downstairs when ever they are at our house. Now they have moved in with us and dad wants me to spend more time bonding with my “siblings”. I used to go to friends houses after school or friends would come to my house but dad and Catherine no longer allow that because I should be focusing on our new “family” unit.
Dad is forcing his fiance and her kids down my neck. I had to babysit 6 weekends in a row all 7 of the kids on my own and it was hard because I don’t even know the kids. My best friend came to help me but when dad and Catherine got home Catherine grounded me for asking for help. I had told my dad I would not be able to do it on my own but he says I can look after my own siblings. I tried to tell them again but I ended up grounded for 2 weeks. Yet I was allowed to babysit.
They have never paid me for babysitting more than 10 hours at a time. Its so not fair, I am expected to be a bridesmaid at the wedding but I don’t even want to go anymore.
Is all this right? Should Catherine have the right to ground me?
Update:
I sat down with dad and he say either things could be a lot worse (which I know but its no excuse) or that I should be willing to look after my siblings.
Update 2:
Only each set of twins share a dad none of the other have the same dad.
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No this is not right!!! Their are laws against this. You didn’t give birth to 7 kids, their not your responsibility and with you being 15 you need to be supervised also. I think Catherine saw you as nothing more than a live in nanny. I’m so angry at your dad for allowing this to happen! What kind of a tramp is this Catherine one! Has she never heard of contraception?
Anyways you need to report this immediately!!!! A councillor, a police person, social worker preferably anyone who will listen and try and help you! As soon as your 16 apply for a job to get you out of that hell hole and start giving you independence although no doubt Catherine will be there with her hand out looking for her keep!
I honestly think you need go get out now and I would never normally say this ! Your dad is not a good man, your not blood related to these kids. Is there a grand parent, aunt anyone you could live?
Source(s): I’m 29 years old and a mother to an 8 year old girl. I would never put her through this, I cant even imagine it!
It’s not reasonable. To start with, the age you’re in correct now, you need to play together with your friends and socialize. Nevertheless, ask them to cut down the hours, and not more days, considering you actually have a existence. Don’t count on pay that a lot, cuz you can get it from extra respect and love for you. Catherine should not ground you. How about, if you are allowed, taking your quality buddy and all seven youngsters to the playground? There you just hold an eye fixed on the children, ensure they are not jogging off someplace else, and perhaps speak to your buddy at the same time keeping the eye. Additionally, she will have to no longer call you a s***. She is also one herself, what with the entire kids from exceptional fathers.
Sounds pretty serious. I will now outline what a good and bad girl would do (I don’t know which you are, hopefully a bad one hahahaha)
Good option: Talk to your dad, as in a proper chat, if he doesn’t understand then he’s a dick.
Bad option: Rebel. Tell him you’re not doing it anymore and if they leave you with the kids again then you will simply leave the house and call the police on him (for having so many kids unattended. Won’t sort out your grounded problem or “family” relationship but will certainly stop the having to attend the buggers.
Also, 7 kids in 7 years? What is this woman? That’s not normal.
I hate to say this but, the way it is going, you will end up being an unpaid servant. You need to have a very serious talk with your dad and explain to him that, as a 15 year old, you should be focusing on your studies and school work and well as bonding with friends.
You are entitled to a life and you should, at the very least, get some renumeration for your efforts but, also, not to be taken for granted.
I don´t blame you for not wanting to be a bridesmaid. Seven kids is a lot to take on in one go and your father should be thinking of you and you´re welfare first.
This isn’t fair. It also isn’t safe. A couple of kids, for sure, sometimes, but SEVEN! Every weekend is mean, and the convenient excuses to ground you are just that. Excuses. Just a way to get you to look after the kids again. It needs to stop as I honestly think this is verging on an abusive situation. Do you have a counsellor at your school? I recommend that you see them as soon as you can. I understand your upset at being expected to be a bridesmaid. Being asked and given the option is nice, but you absolutely should have a choice. I’m a mum, I sometimes care for other mums kids , but seven alone? That’s going to be exhausting and affect your schoolwork and health. I’m not from the US and so I am unsure as to your customs, but I think you are being used as slave labour,
I also have my suspicions about you being cut off from your friends. Get help Hon, quickly.
Source(s): 14 yrs being a mum.
Fck tht!! I would be so pissed! Not at the kids it ain’t their faults they probably have their own **** to deal with not having their real dad around, but as for trying to bond yes I think u should it would be good for u and just because they ain’t the same blood as u doesn’t mean their can’t be no love between u guys, as for ur dad he really should be more considerate of ur feelings but u should also, but it seems tht he may be taking advantage of u a bit, as for CATHERINE I would understand if u did something wrong but it doesn’t seem like that, She’s just being a bit’ch it seems, don’t take her **** tho she’s moving into ur family not the other way around and as the oldest u must have a say! Everything with respect!
Source(s): Hate how I see ths so much!!
If they are engaged, no, she shouldn’t have the right to ground you, but if your dad is ok with her doing so, nothing you can do about it. You need to stick up for yourself, if you don’t want to bond with them or watch them, then don’t. Take all the punishment they send your way, eventually they will get the picture and stop asking you for help. Or let them do whatever they want and just leave the house, they cannot hit you, just punish you more, but its ok, in the long run you come out ahead. Rebel.
Try having a word with your dad on his own. You should not be having to babysit 7 children on your own at 15, especially for such long periods of time!
if it comes to it, downright refuse to watch them, you are already grounded so it can’t be much worse.
You need to be firm with them, they should not be putting themselves ahead of you guys.
If you feel like you can’t say anything, then write it all down, be blunt and honest, and hand the note to them.
Good luck!
If you have any grandparents, aunts or uncles that you trust best advice speak to them see if they can help or even let you live with them.
If you want to take it to the extreme phone childline or social services no 15 year old should be being left alone to care for that many kids
it’s bad what catherine has done to you, baby sitting 7 kids with no money or helps bad i baby sit one child and get money but have never done it for longer that 10 hours, i would suggest siting down and talking to your dad on his own but he may ground you< never been in this situation sorry