Does this poem make sense to you?

Okay, so I was in seventh period on Friday, bored out of my mind and I was thinking of things and all of a sudden the sentence “Hello My Love” popped up and I thought “Hmm, I haven’t wrote a poem in a long time so I took out a piece of paper and wrote the words “Hello My Love” then I thought, what would come next and then I thought, “I recently had my heart broken by I boy and I feel like he didn’t like me” so I put. “Yet, you don’t like me” and then I said “Well that doesn’t make sense I said love so I changed and to love and well, I wrote the poem. So here it is, I don’t think it makes sense, I was just writing to write:

Hello my love

Yet, you don’t love me

The wind shakes the tree suddenly

I stand as it flows through my hair

I wait, wait for you but I don’t see you here

Hello My Love

Yet, you don’t love me

I left a note by our special place

Where the moon and the sun meet each day

Black ink, red hearts, My special perfume

******************************************

Hello My Love

Yet, you don’t love me

The clock struck midnight

The sky pitch black

You didn’t show, but why am I still here?

My Body. Ache. My Feet. Sore

Yet I still stand here, nothing more.

********************************* – Means I couldn’t figure out what to put there.

Of course this Is a rough draft and it still needs work, I just need someone to give me some constructive criticism, tips, etc.

*Please and Thank You*

Answer
? Favorite Answer

  • it’s all very cliche and unoriginal lines make the poem more personal

    Source(s): <–about to graduate college in days with a degree in creative writing

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