Yesterday I went out with friends with out telling anyone and I was gone for the nearly the whole day, my foster mom thought I had run away and told my case worker. Everyone freaked out and when I came home my foster mom hugged me but then told me I had to apologies to my case worker. How do I apologies?
(If I am honest I am not that sorry)
Update:
I told my foster mom she only cared about the impression and got grounded for two days. I am close with my foster parents and my foster siblings. If my parents rights get terminated in a few weeks I will hopefully stay with them. They have already told me that they would treat me like their own and would help pay so I can go to college
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I LOVE how all the people who AREN’T foster parents are blaming the foster parents. Perhaps some of them, who just write checks, should actually DO something and become foster parents.
Your foster mother DID NOT jump the gun. A foster parent has to notify the police and the caseworker if the child goes missing. And it isn’t an issue of them being laxed with your safety. I’m betting you just didn’t get up from the couch and walk out of the house. Did you sneak away from school? Or maybe tell your foster mom that you were going over to a friend’s to study and took a detour. You pulled the same nonsense that hundreds of biological, step, adoptive and foster teenagers pull everyday except with you, it is a little different.
If you want to stay with your foster parents after the parental rights are terminated, you need to understand one simple thing. DO NOT get a reputation as a runaway. If your foster parents and caseworker think that you can not be trusted and you are going to pull these disappearing acts, you better believe that you will end up in a group home or juvenile intake. I have had foster children come to my home from group homes because they were pulling this nonsense before and I have had foster children GO to group homes or juvenile intake because they thought they could just runaway/disappear. At the very least, you are going to be put on a safety plan which is a pain in the butt for you because literally you will have to be in your foster parent’s sight at all time and if you get out of sight, they can and are required to call the police on you. Think about how much of a drag that is going to be if all you want to do is go to the bathroom at the store and you have to be accompanied like you are a 5 year old child. Or if you want to flirt with some cute guy at the mall or at the library. He is going to notice that middle age woman lurking in the aisle because she isn’t going to let you out of her sight.
So, yes you need to apologize. You may not regret the fun you had but you need to realize that you have put yourself, your foster parent and your caseworker in a bad position. And as a foster parent, I can tell you for a fact that your foster mother was more worried about you then impressions. It is YOU who need to start worry about what impression you are giving because it might just come back and bite you in the butt big time.
Source(s): Personal experience as a foster parent
Lesson learned! Always tell your mom/foster mom where you are. I did that at 16 was hanging out with my friends and she was upset she said said something to me for some reason stuck out in my mind she said for all I know you could be floating down the river going down in the drop off and wouldn’t even know where to begin to look for you… If you say your at your friends house be at your friends house if you guys decide to go to Walmart give me a quick call before you go or if you guys go visit another friend together give me a call just so I know your ok. She dident want to know my “business” or my “secrets” she just wanted to know I was ok.
“Yo caseworker, sorry, I should have remembered to tell fostermom where I was going, I will do so next time. I’m very sorry for all the panic I caused.”
See, that’s all, you are just being a nice kid, but a bit too careless in the safety of the foster family. If you like your fosters, and want to stay with them, you better be sorry and say so, as caseworkers can be very unreasonable about that kind of stunts.
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I don’t think you should apologise to your case worker. An apology should come from the heart, not be imposed upon you. The foster woman only cares about what impression SHE is leaving on the case worker and not about your welfare.
However, you should promise the foster woman that you’ll never stay away without telling ever again. Don’t put yourself in unnecessary danger and don’t do it again without saying where you are going and calling if you are staying longer than planned. This is basic life skill.
The apology is owed to your foster parents, not your caseworker.
Your Foster mother needs to apologise to the case worker for being remiss in her care of you.
She is the adult and entirely responsible for keeping you safe and knowing your whereabouts at all times
What did your parents do?
Say sorry and give choclates