My 2nd cousin is pregnant with her third child. She works at Sonic s and lives with her parents. The father of the baby is a very bad alcoholic and is not in the picture. She feels she can not offer this child a good home, and has made the choice for baby to be placed in a more stable and loving situation.She has asked me and my husband to be the parents of her child. We are honored of her choice, and we have 3 months until she is due. She didn’t know she was pregnant for 5 months. She lives in New Mexico while we live in Colorado. We are also native american (navajo) and she wants the baby to stay in the family she does not want to give the baby to some other family.
We have been through all but one of the classes to become a foster/adopt couple in denver county. This was before we she was pregnant- we have always wanted to adopt/foster. Although we have been through the classes, we never dealt with a situation where the mother was willing and had her family chosen. We do not have a lot of money but enough to allow me to stay home with our 4 yr old daughter. How would we go about this? Do we need a lawyer, do we have to go through the county, who do I call first? She is willing to sign over her rights to us… would guardianship be possible or would adoption be best? Do we still need to complete the homestudy? How does it work with the interstate adoption?
Currently we live with my parents while we are saving to buy a house. We planned to be ready to move and start looking to buy a month after she is due. We have our own level of the house (Daughter has her own room and we have a bathroom ) and as a native family- we often find a few generations in one household. My mother is on board for bringing the child here with us while we look for a home. Will this prevent the adoption? Do the same rules apply when the mother is giving up her rights?
I am just trying to get this all figured out. I called some law firms and Im waiting for calls back. What will an adoption lawyer cost roughly?
Thank you in advance to those who answer. I am a bit stressed as I have only 3 months (or less) to get this all figured out and get ready for the baby…. Im excited but Im trying not to get my hopes up… i know that I couldn’t let my baby go so I would understand if she can’t. But she seems very set and actually sounds likes she really has thought it through.
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The easiest thing to do would be to have your cousin give you legal guardianship of her child.
No expense at all involved in that.
Wishing you well.
Adoptions within families are usually not difficult or that costly. If you have been working to become a foster/adopt couple talk to your social worker on the next steps, they should be able to guide you or point you in the direction of a family attorney. If you go the guardianship route, then you will have to decide if one day your cousin wants the child back, could you handle that? Adoption makes the child yours forever. GL
Well you will have the Indian Child Welfare Act in your favour. That is a federal law that gives native americans the chance to adopt other native American children and keep them within the tribe. I would suggest speaking with a lawyer and tribal officials.
New Mexico Christian children’s home is a good place to start. If you cousin wants to adopt out the baby, they will assist her and if she decides to parent, they will help her there too. They provide housing and medical care. They can answer all your questions for you. They have a lawyer, they do home study ect. good luck. Understand that both parents will need to sign off on it.
I can’t answer all your questions, but I can tell you that a family law attorney will probably run you about $150-$2/hr. However, the first consultation (usually via phone for half an hour or so) is usually free.