My youngest son hates me but does he know i always will love him and worry about him?

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he is 27 and doesn’t want to know me and he never replies my messages or answers my calls last time I saw him was 4 years ago when we had a big argument when told me he hates my guts and told me to drop dead which was hurting to me at the time but since then I haven’t seen or heard from him I do worry sick about him not knowing how he is his my last baby and as for my other son and daughter who I suspect they keep in close contact with him won’t tell me well I guess they respect they lil brothers privacy if he refers it that way I just wish he knows im worried and I do miss him.

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  • This is such a sad story. I had this problem with my dad. I am 25. So it is the reverse of your situation. My dad didn’t and still doesn’t fully understand me and the way i live my life. He would never hear me out so I never could explain how this made me feel and why i chose the msn i chose to marry. I decided to write him a detailed letter explaining my feelings towards everything and what i wanted to get out of the letter. It worked my dad doesn’t understand or agree with my life choices… but he respects it and that has made us a lot closer. Maybe writing a long letter about how you feel and what trulu want to happen will help your son. That way there is no pressure for him to talk face to face or by phone. He will read the letter. Mail it and don’t pressure him to talk about it… at least you will know that he knows how you feel and he will always have the letter to read later too. Maybe you could even encourage him write you back if he doesn’t want to talk. I think everyone has an easier time writing than speaking feelings. Good luck and god bless!

  • Well, either you shouldnt have done anything to make him feel that way, or he shouldnt be such a baby. Hes your youngest, who.cares? Its all about the first born. Do what you can for the first born.

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  • One day he will have kids of his own and understand.
    But if he doesn’t realize from that, one day he will regret saying that he hated you.
    But deep down, he probly still loves you.

  • it sounds like you’ve accepted his decision to not keep in touch. I don’t guess you have much choice in the matter. When you speak to your other children, just mention that if they hear from their brother to tell him you miss him. Twenty-seven is grown up so he probably doesn’t want to hear that you’re worried about him. He might think of that as an insult.

    Also, there is clearly a lot more to this story than you’ve put here … thanks for not feeling like you need to relate the whole thing. But go back over the time when you did see and speak to your son. Maybe you ‘hovered’ too much or criticized his choices. There are reasons that family feelings get hurt. Someone isn’t likely to just wake up one morning and decide they hate their parents’ guts. Consider speaking to a therapist to learn some coping skills and learn how to leave this hurt in a place that doesn’t effect your daily life. I expect you’ll be happier if you can do that.

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