I am currently a trainee lawyer at a law firm and have been working there for a few months. My boss has always acted a little flirty towards me but I assumed that that was just who he is.
However, yesterday, when I made my way into his office simply to pass on some documents, he got up out of his seat and was walking towards me until I was against the wall. He started professing his feelings towards me, and kissed me on the cheek. I desperately wanted to push him away, but (and I admit this with shame) feared that this action could result in the loss of my job.
I kindly told him that I was not interested in a relationship at the moment, and that what he was doing was very wrong since he is married with children.
I called in sick to work today.
While I do admit that my boss is an attractive man, I could never engage in a relationship with someone who is already in a relationship. I also never intend to have any sexual relations with a boss as I feel that it will always end up in disaster.
A while ago on our way to a meeting I had to ring his wife on my phone (his phone was out of charge). While I have not made any calls since to his wife, I am seriously considering ringing her and informing her of the incident.
I feel very guilty knowing that she is with a man who is willing to commit adultery. I know that if I was her in this situation I would be most grateful. However, I worked very hard to get into this firm and feel very reluctant to lose my place at the firm.
Please provide advice of what to do in such a sticky situation. Many thanks in advance.
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if you felt so strongly that you had to leave your job – then I would say at that point you could tell her
why should you feel guilty if you said no thank you?
she’s not your friend dear – the best thing to do is say nothing unless she asks you herself and then do not lie
Is this man the head of the law firm? If not then you know the laws and what you should be doing, if not then get out because you won’t be a good lawyer. Do you think his wife doesn’t already know he is a flirt and will try time and again to have an affair. So do your job and if he comes on to you again, ask him if what he is doing is sexual harassment, he will get the point, you may not have a job, but then you sue the firm and name him.
At this point it’s your word against his. Since he is the head of a successful law firm…who do you think people will believe? He can make up an even bigger more damaging lie about you and destroy your new career you spent years studying for. I suggest you continue to thwart his advances while you find another job. Once you have one…send his wife an anonymous (typed) letter telling her that her husband is a lying cheat. My guess is she’ll stay with him because she’s probably only with him for the money anyway.
Don’t do it! It’s not your business. You think you’re in the middle of this, but it’s not your place to say anything. If you do, you’ll lose your job, and you’ll break that woman’s heart. Maybe your boss just needed to hear from you it’s not an option – and maybe now he’ll come to his senses and realize that he made a mistake. Maybe he’ll be a better husband for it. Or maybe he’ll just cheat with another girl. If he does – his wife will eventually find out. But you should not be the one to say anything.
I work at a large law firm and what you describe happens quite often. Most wives know what goes on and choose to ignore it because they have plenty of money. They both pretty much do what they want.
Sinc ethis is a private firm, the only legal recourse you may have is to go to one of the other partners and claim sexual harassment. It may be better than telling his wife. If the other partners know (at least the senior partner) he may be able to protect your job.
she isnt going to thank you
yes he is a pig, of the lowest degree
but is it worth risking not only this job but your whole career over?
normally i would say stand up for yourself, out this guy etc etc
but law is notoriously still “an old boys club”
make waves no and you will find it hard to practice anywhere
you have told him and made your feelings clear
get back to work and leave things as they are
She’s most likely not going to believe you. And who “rings” people these days anyways besides my 90 year old grandmother.
Bust him for sexual harassment.
You said no, he backed off. I don’t get why you think you need to keep the drama going by calling his wife.
He hired you thinking he would groom you to be his Mistress.
So far it hasn’t worked out for him.
But he will keep trying.
Every time you resist, he will try harder.
Source(s): You need to be finding yourself another job.
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